Cabin Fever-Induced Goal Setting of 2016

I am afraid of goal setting. There. I said it. It stresses me out. I don’t like looking in the mirror and feeling the way I judge myself for not meeting my own expectations.

Goal Setting Funny

I know I’m not the only one who feels this way!

However, I got tricked into goal setting this year.

The day after Christmas brought Goliath or Snowmageddon or whatever we’re supposed to call the blizzard that dumped around 10″ of snow on us in the Panhandle. We hadn’t left the house much for about a week and I had a good dose of cabin fever. It was sub-freezing outside, but I was in a meltdown. After my husband talked me down off the ledge he helped me verbalize what was really bothering me. I just needed some time alone locked away in our freezing, uninsulated office with a space heater, warm clothes, coffee and a computer. It was wonderful. I finally started going through a blogging binder I bought a few weeks back, but hadn’t had a chance to start using.

During my chill out time in the freezing office I decided to use this year to share more of my heart behind the songs we sing at church and how they’ve impacted my life. This allows me to write about two huge passions: worship and writing. That’s a good thing, right? So the first song I want to dive into is not one we’re doing at church yet. Go figure. I’ve never been good at keeping New Year’s Resolutions. What can I say?

Anthony Brown and Pat Barrett’s Good, Good Father is just wonderful.

My friend Laura told me about it a good while back, but I didn’t really grab hold of it until this past fall. Something about this season I’m in created a place of opportunity for that song to take root and grow. Probably because at times I don’t feel like a good enough mother or a good enough wife. The chorus brings me to a place where I can replace lies of “not enough” with truth.

Tension exists between what I know and what I believe. I know in my head that I am righteous because of Jesus Christ’s finished work on the cross. Yet old patterns die hard, and my heart just doesn’t believe it some days. When I believe the lie that His work isn’t enough to help me, then all sorts of nasty begin to grow from there. I can’t tell you what I was feeling at the exact moment I heard this song with fresh ears, but I do know my soul responded strongly to the melody of:

You’re a Good Good Father
It’s who You are
It’s who You are
It’s who You are
And I’m loved by You
It’s who I am
It’s who I am
It’s who I am

My spirit cried out, “Yes!” It was like finding a secret stash of Blue Bell ice cream in the middle of the famine. I couldn’t get enough it. The song, I mean. And Blue Bell, too, but let’s get back to the song! I’ve probably worn my family out on it, but I hope that message is seared into the hard drive of their brain and heart. I think it’s working because the girls and I played a game where we hummed a tune and the others had to guess what the song was. I hummed Good, Good Father and the 3-yr-old guessed it immediately!
No matter how badly I’ve blown it with my family, that song reminds me that I have a chance to try again and keep my heart open to my loved ones. How about this for goal setting: keep my heart open no matter what. I don’t have to wallow in self-pity or blame others for my actions. I have a choice when confronted with temptation. If I don’t like the harvest of my choices, then I can seek forgiveness and plant better seed.

He is a Good Father. I expect so much of myself and get so frustrated when I fall short of what I’d hoped. He never seems to be weirded out by my failures. He loves my heart and gives me the grace I need to forgive myself, evaluate my expectations and make better choices. I’m in training and He’s right here with me every step of the way. This song reminds me of that, and I don’t want to forget it.

Which song means a lot to you in this season and why?

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Comments

  1. I love this! I’m so excited for you and for what you’ll be blogging about!! This song is so powerful. If we could really grasp (like really, really get it!) that He is good, and we are loved, we would operate on a whole new level!! Thanks for being vulnerable about the tension!! I know what you mean! Love you, friend!!
    Laura C. Brandenburg recently posted…Creating a Vision for Your FamilyMy Profile

    • jodilafrance says:

      Thanks Laura! I couldn’t agree with you more about being able to go to a new level with the Lord as we receive the revelation that He is Good!

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